This poem was written in response to all of the support I’ve received recently, and these pieces in particular; essa + ECHIDNA: In Which a Friend Finally Gives Back & Aroha for essa.
And to Lily Holloway thank you so much for everything.
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Naakahi short for Hinenaakahirua
yeah they’re a they/them bitch now
a Raukawa bitch now
and they’re fucking loved!
(the hate can slide right off their scales)
at the cinema sitting down with popcorn to watch
their best friends fuck in all their animated glory!
EATING LIVER AND EATING OUT AMIRIGHT
the rock of Mt Elbrus pulling a face
like ‘oh shit’ knowing what liquids are
coming next. Maaui and Prometheus or
Narcissus and Sisyphus.
Naakahi watching Narcissus reflect and Sisyphus get on a roll
lifting each other out of whatever trouble that has found them
lifting them all out of the trouble, falling in love as revolutionary
Naakahi feeling golden, feeling explosive when the credits roll
and it’s all their loved ones scrolling white on that deep satisfying black
with the film over, the room gets so so quiet they can hear their own
blood and the love that swims in the pump how alive
HOW FUCKING ALIVE IT ALL IS
WHY WOULD YOU EVER STOP IT
after the film Eve comes round and they hang out like old times
talking shit about everything that has happened
men who can’t put their ego down take it out on others
quiet conversations about how coming out as Maaori is perhaps
harder than coming out as gay
they collage the two identities together
and something shines through
O THE VIBE IS STRONG ON THAT
Naakahi delivers voice messages into their phone
too long and stuttering to be for anyone but someone they love
thinking of it as sending wairua down the wire
feeling absolutely spent sometimes they just need to shove food
in their gob and get some sleep Naakahi has learnt a lot in the last
two months about taking care of themself
stares into the mirror
MONSTROUS AND PROUD
how did it take this long to figure out!!!
a top 20 vegetarian poet in NZ doing the rounds
thinks to the chimerae (the delectably alien!) who they have been made by
or who have been made by them slithering along cos walking is boring as fuck
and sliding through this world is the only thing that makes sense sometimes
from tail to crown they are full to the brim with warm
for once nothing to do with Tama-nui-te-raa
oh it’s belonging and the beautiful green sweater
their Commiescientist lover has knitted them
THE CROP IS PRISTINE
Naakahi watches her get ready from the doorway; a teacher
they’re always learning something new from, discovering
something new in the molecular structure of their relationship
stretching outwards like genetic code like an unravelling ball of wool
OH TO KNOW SUCH LOVE OH TO KNOW
TO KNOW IT MAKES DEATH LIGHTER
THIS FORTIFICATION WE SPIN
does Naakahi work as well as Echidna repeated three times
and what is summoned when they do? Or who? Naakahi, Naakahi,
Naakahi relaxes for the first time in a long time
getting off a 6-hour call with the Spider (yes that spider the one
they won’t ever shut up about) that eight limbed genius they have
missed with their whole body
sits there in their study and swims through the koorero;
jokes about putting the waa in waa
time spiraling gender out into the milky way
Naakahi loves to watch when people transform
and the Spider (who goes by Puungaawerewere Puaaho now)
keeps on evolving over and over and over and
if there was a reason they had to give for why
they’re still here it would be to watch their loved ones
grow into what makes them happy and whole
with that saccharine notion going down
Naakahi (that Raukawa bish, that they/them bish)
lays a blanket over a tale that comes from
(not the gods this time) but their friends
essa may ranapiri 